Yoga.

In my attempts to maintain some level of physical activity, I've attempted to keep a routine program of rowing. It has been a success so far, but I only row every other day. I've been desiring to do a less aggressive form of excercise on the off days. As a result, I've recently taken up yoga every other day. The practice along with pelatis has always fascinated me, that simple body positioning and breathing techniques can have such a dramatic impact on energy and health.

So in my curiosity, I've brought this practice into my evening activites. I have to admit it is a bit more difficult that I imagined. Some of this is largely due to my relative lack of limberness, but some of the positioning is quite tiresome to maintain. I'm still working on synchronizing the breathing with the positioning though as I know that is an important element.

Overall, it has been a positive experience, even if I do feel rediculous doing it on occassion. You can guarantee you won't see me in a class trying to do a sunward bow position anytime soon :P However, if anyone is looking for a low impact form of exercise with positive mojo, I would definately recommend it. Hopefully in time it will increase my flexibility, body energy, and general gracefullness. Until then, I guess I'll stick to looking silly.

10 Items or less.

While looking through the movies available on demand recently, I settled on watching an independant film with Morgan Freeman. Partially because I find Morgan Freeman a fascinating actor and the premise sounded appealing. I was greeted with a pleasant film that was highly dependant on its dialogue. Ultimately at one point in the film the two protaganists encourage the other to make an list.

10 Items or Less: 10 things in life that you would do without.
10 Items or Less: 10 things in life that you would keep.

The lists were whimsical and pertinent to the characters. Although it isn't an exact science, and would probably be heavily edited I think this is at least a fun excercise. So here are my 10 items.

10 Items I could live without:

1. People in a rush
2. Circling the runway in an airplane
3. Gossip
4. Texas heat
5. Predictable endings
6. Poor grammar
7. Partisan blindness
8. Tardiness
9. (open)
10. (open)

10 Items I would keep:

1. Great stories
2. Laughter and Romance
3. My mother and father
4. Free Will
5. A gentle spring/fall breeze
6. A warm bath
7. Good food
8. Great music
9. Comfortable place to sleep
10. Purposeful work

Thoughts on simple investing

Some individuals I know asked me my opinion about investing recently. I make no qualms about my interest in finance and personal finance. That being said, I always get cautious when asked these questions. I guess, I'd hate for anyone to take my opinion, act on it, and be less than satisfied. I usually stick to some simple rules though:

1) Don't invest money you can't risk losing.
2) Make investing a habit.
3) Don't invest in something you don't understand.
4) Invest for the long term and don't watch it every day.

I usually tell people to invest in a blend of investments and review them every 3 months and ask the following 3 questions:

1) What happened with my investments the last few months?
2) I'm I happy with the results?
3) Do I forsee these investments being where I want my money in the immediate future?

Then think of those answers and extend your time horizon out over 4-5 years. It's a bit simplistic, but I guess I don't think personal finance is that complicated. People tend to make it too difficult or sway to much with emotion of what happened to this or what happened to that. Everyone knows the rule of "buy low, sell high", but the fact is most people "buy high, sell low" because they are motivated by emotion. How many people pulled out of the market at the beginning of this year due to the plunge of the market and locked in their losses. This years market returns are in the teens and twenties for growth stock investing.

It just amazes me sometimes, how investing from a personal standpoint works. So many out there selling products that are complicated that they can't even explain or would invest in themselves. They pawn themselves off as professionals. I guess that is what steered me away from personal finance. I dreaded selling a product to a consumer they didn't need simply because it was what the brokerage house wanted to push that year. I love working with people, teaching people, educating people, but I didn't want to sell trash.

Oh well... I guess the best we can do is talk over these things with people we respect and trust, and make the best decisions we can.

My impressions of jolly 'ol England

While it is fair to say my overall experience in England was limited to London and that my not be completely representative, I did come away from my trip with a positive inpression. I was overseas to visit my good friends Jon and Andy. Whether it had been England, France, Japan, or Turkey I'm sure that my time would have been delightful simply due their company. The unenviable chore of being my host primarily fell on the shoulders of Andy, and she did a delightful job of it. I think it must be hard to entertain someone like me, that sometimes lacks on the vibrant emotion side and doesn't keep a rigid schedule or plan. But she managed through.

When I had planned to visit, I sort of had an idea in my mind that London would be a rather fast paced city. I had the pleasure of visiting Jon a few times in New York, and always felt it a bit too rushed for my liking. You had to have a plan and stick to it around town, or otherwise you might be run over. Los Angeles felt like this to me as well during my last visit there. However, I found London much more balanced than that. I chalk it up to the fact that the city isn't built as high as our modern cities and the English are so used to queueing for things. This creates a society that isn't as jam packed and has patience to do things in time. It made the city much more enjoyable than I imagined.

I would say my favorite piece of the adventure was the sitting down to dinner with my friends at the Eagle and Child pub. The obvious draw to this location is the relative proximity to Oxford University, and the historical draw of Tolkein and C. S. Lewis. While I do find this fascinating, it did little to spark the imagination of the two great writers actually sitting there. However, despite that it was still a very lovely locale and served a pretty reasonable meal. I was just able to relax with good food and good company.

Ultimately, I could see myself returning one day despite if my friends were in town or not. But next time, a few more trips out of the city might be enjoyable. Someone I know needs to move to Japan though, so I have an excuse to go there next :)

Glee.

Most individuals enjoy watching at least one series on television on a regular basis. Despite all the horrible pilots that come on every year, the writers and producers usually find a hit somewhere in the mess. We as fans pick and choose often before we even watch the show due to our impression of what the show will be instead of what it actually is.

I have to say that I fell into this trap when I first saw the commercials about Glee that were unclear about the premise of the show. As a result, I summarily dismissed it despite its intriguing marketing. However, after a recommendation to check out the show, I find that I really do enjoy it. It seems to be a perfect match of my enjoyment of music, comedy, and a bit of cynical wit.

It has quickly become a program I look forward to seeing because I enjoy its thoughtful yet light hearted humor. It's also a departure from some of the more high intensity shows I enjoy like Lost and Lie to Me. Anyway, I've recommended this show to some, and I hope they enjoy it as much as I do. And if not the plot at least the fun singing and dancing they do on the show.

And with that, enjoy a scene that made me smile. Who doesn't love a little Young MC.

What are you passionate about?

What are you passionate about?

This is a question that has been posed to me. In truth, it is has given me a bit of trouble answering. Passion is a very strong word, it surpasses excitement or enjoyment. It strikes to the very essence of something that you feel an immensely strong attachment too. Passion is so often related to romance due to the intense nature of the emotion. As this very question was posed to me, I struggled to find an answer what was a driving passion of mine. This struggle in pinpointing an appropriate answer raised three questions in my mind.

1) Am I in fact a dispassionate person?

Dictionary.com defines dispassionate as devoid of personal feeling or bias. It sounds so cold. However, if I can't find something I can't quickly name as irremovable from my life then is that not a lack of passion for something? Many people find passion in religion, work, a hobby, and many other things. And although I value all these things, I can't say I feel an intense emotional connection to these items.

2) If I am a generally dispassionate person, is that a bad thing?

This is where I struggle with an answer. Is it wrong to lack a passion for something? I could give a generic answer like: "I'm passionate about life." However, then you have to ask, what about life gives you passion? You can't tell me that you would be passionate about standing in a hospital room with your dying grandparent that has struggled with cancer for 2 years. (Theoretical) Yet that is life... So being passionate about "life" isn't enough for me.

Is lacking passion another way of saying you lack direction? Is it saying you've been too cautious to put a personal stake in something? Or worse does it mean you are uncaring? And if you are lacking something to be passionate about, can you find it?

3) How do you find your passion?

Let us suppose that I was looking to find something to be passionate about. Where would you look? Isn't your passion supposed to be natural? Or is it something you have to work at becoming? I enjoy writing, but it is taxing at times. I enjoy books, but I don't want to read every weekend. I enjoy teaching, but you can only teach if there are people that wish to learn from you.

Is the trick to finding a passion simply trying lots of things? Or should it be something you are already drawn too. And if it is something you should just find by trying things, where does one start?

Ultimately, I have simply answered a question with a question. That is far from ideal, but it is where my mind is at right now. I don't have the answer to the question what I am passionate about, and that bothers me. Hopefully that is a good thing.

Would you rather....

A game that has been played in movies and television shows alike. A game that you likely have played at home or with friends. Often times, it is more of a pick the less of two evil scenarios, but I had a question rolling around in my head the last few days that was its own conceptual would I rather...

If I were to write a novel or screenplay, would I rather write a popular smash hit of questionable quality, a deep hitting award winning story you will watch once and never want to struggle through again, or a novel concept that never took off but the work was still quality? What spurred this thought was watching a film that didn't receive any great reviews but I enjoyed none the less. I started to think about other films I've seen.

Three great examples of films like these are Armageddon, Million Dollar Baby, and Memento. All films I've watched and enjoyed for various reasons, but none for the same reason.

Now on one hand, Armageddon had mass appeal with a star studded lineup and sound track. It was a wonderful summer film and is still shown constantly on television. I can't imagine the amount of money and residuals that were spawned by this film. Furthermore it is completely rewatchable for its entertainment value, but no one is walking home with year end awards from this one.

On the other hand you have a film like Million Dollar Baby which was an emotionally gut wrenching film that I wouldn't wish on anyone to watch more than once. The sheer and raw pain and agony portrayed in the film is wonderfully done, but not something you go to bed happy about viewing.

Finally is Memento which I found a fascinating concept and well put together from a writing standpoint. It wasn't flashy and lacked the emotional depth of some stories, but it was very well conceived. The imaginative nature of the concept should receive praise, and although it will long be forgotten over time, I imagine the creator was happy with his end product.

So what would I want to put my name on? Usually once you get good at something that becomes your "thing." So if you had to be type cast in that which you produce, which would you choose? It a thought that has been rolling around in my head lately, and I don't have my answer yet. But it's fun to think about.

Bluebonnets

There are few things in this world that defy logic as much as traditions. Whether it be familial, religious, or just plain usual, traditions are often things that make little sense outside those that are participating. I try not to be cynical, as I know I fall into the category of a traditionalist in some aspects of my life, but Texas can sometime really take the cake when it comes to being "Texan."

However, as I was driving down the road today, I could not begrudge those that were stopped on the side of the road to take pictures amongst the bluebonnets. Maybe it was because they weren't holding up traffic (then I might have felt different.) However it is nice to see loved ones out enjoying an evening together taking pictures of their children or significant others amongst the flowers. It's a bit of quaint country flair amongst the big city lights. Although sometimes I question the wisdom of getting the kids out of the car on 183 in the middle of the day.

I promise you, in the span of 2 miles of busy highway I saw at least 6 families stopped at various patches of flora. Anyway, I hope that it was a pleasant evening for all of them. It is furthermore my hope that maybe one day out with the right person, you might find me taking pictures as well amongst Texas' favorite flower.

Storytelling

Those that know me well understand that I have a particular intrigue in the past time of storytelling. Whether it be by the written word or the visual stimulus of play or film, I truly enjoy watching a drama unfold. It is likely the reason I can even watch a bad film or read a bad book at least once to the end, despite how I might feel at any point during the adventure. The development of a plot via the twists and turns can be as complex as a riddle or as simple as a coloring book.

I believe that ultimately attracts me to these things is that I consider it a true gift. I pride myself in being able to see things in various steps along a paths that have not been travelled yet. I like to think that I can often see the larger picture as a whole and work myself through the measures and verse. However, despite that ability or lack their of, even the most forward minded person may be poor at relaying the story. It takes a certain gift to both have the foresight to see a story in its entire nature and the bends it must take, but yet not approach it as a formula or problem that must be explained or solved. It is the very ability to walk someone through a tapestry of concepts while maintaining the very mystery of the whole. It takes an ability to suspend the satisfaction of the solution to wallow in the happiness, sadness or worry of the process.

I wish I had more of this talent, and I am thankful for those that do. However, at this time, I'll be content in the ability to simply appreciate the gift others give in their stories.

Items in my life and some old writings

This is a long post, with a lot of stuff for personal use attached to the end:

Well I have officially relocated as of the past weekend. The effort has thrown me extremely behind at work and I still have a number of things around the house to be organized. I know it will all come together with time and patience, but it can still be frustrating. I'm going to try to include photos once all my furniture has arrived and I have everything placed accordingly.

Also this weekend will include the adventure of finding a church home. I obviously can't drive all the way to St Bart's anymore for Mass. That means it is time to look at some around the house. This is never something I enjoy but it is a necessary task. I'll probably start at Most Blessed Sacrament this weekend due to an old friend mentioning they enjoyed it last time I saw them. If not I'll have to look around. Catholic Churches are generally focused rather specifically on various aspects of ministry, and finding one that focuses strongly on young adults and scriptural study might be a bit difficult. Many focus on family life and social teaching, others on social justice and pastoral services. Some are very focused on youth teaching and catachesis. We'll see what happens.

Anyway, while I was going through my things I ran into some old notebooks: They had some old writings of mine in them. I wanted to catalogue them somewhere for future reference. Do not feel obliged to rummage through my scattered thoughts that follow if you do not wish:

Three strangers on a hill, Standing together, yet still alone, brought together for reasons of their own...

Have you ever felt like a man stuck on an island? Have you ever wanted to be that man? No worries, no cares, time just slips away.

Down that road:

C: G,D,C / G,D,C / G,A,Em / G,D,C
V: G-A-Em

Chorus:
Why, oh, why
Why, oh, why
Did you die for me on that very tree,
Why, oh, why

Verse I:
Three men walking along a dusty road
Two not knowing the one
They were sharing all their stories past
Underneath the midday sun
It wasn't until later that night
when he broke the bread
That they realized exactly who he was
Their savivor risen from the dead

Verse II:
Questions remain from my life gone by
and I hold them deep inside
How could you love a man like me
My heart so filled with pride
I know some answers I'll never find
And there are many things left undone
But I will choose to wait on you
Because you where willing to send your son

Bridge:
A specter comes and fades away
yet the feeling remains the same
You did come to me that dreary night
And you forever lived in me

Untitled:

I found myself, drowned in pride
wading deep in sin
Only if I'd known before
The love coming down from him
For then I would have sang to You
Falling to my knees
Gracious God, where have you been
moving within me
For you know where I am going

You know where I have been
For you know I've been forgiven
You know of my sin
You know every inch I move
You know every mile
Yes you know what's deep insde me
You know of my denial

So I cannot say, nor can I move
or be in You without Your wisdom
I long for You, I cry for You
I need Your Love and your Mercy
Because my life is a gift to You.

Ribbons:
(Written on the balcony overlooking a small town in Northern Spain)

Can ribbon flow like a river?
Endless folds in a see of blue and gold
A rhythm ever changing, yet undefined
Clean chords in harmony with life

Breezes blow with an unending beat
Wonderful sounds flow like a mountain stream
Positions change, but the heart remains
Foriegn tongues, foriegn eyes meld as one

Life slips by to the sound of a rushing finger
Up and down a scale they go
All together they are all as one
They are in the primordial beat of a song lost long ago

Untitled:

I - C - II - C -III - C - C
I & III: E, B, E, B, E, B, E, B
II: Em, D, C, Em, Em, D, C, Em
C: A-E, A-E, A-E, G-D-E

Verse I:
I stood in a valley, and looked to the sea
Walls all around me, no place to be
I was alone, feeling my pain
All pressures building, driving me insane

Chorus:
For the Lord, You are a mountain
Yes God, Spanning the Sea
Oh Lord, You are a mountain
So High, where everyone can sea

Verse II:
I was forgiven, because of your mercy
Cured of my blindness, and now I can be
One of the members, spreading you word
Searching for your face, so your voice is heard

Verse III:
Standing Before you, I fall to my knees
Who will you send Lord, let it be me
Guided by wisdom, you will provide
All of the words, I'll say with pride

Precious One:
(written for a friend on her birthday)

I - C - II - C - III - C
Last two lines in final chorus repeat*

Alternating chord progression:
G-D-E7- C
G-C-G-D

Verse I:
How can a man not be thankful
to find a person like you
Someone who takes the time to
cheer him up when he is blue
You are prescious, one of His daughters
being salt and light to the earth
Could God have sent a more precious angel
to share her life as she is able
I can't wait for the chance to
celebrate with you at his table

Chorus:
Now hop, skip, turn around
The Lord has made you from the ground
Raise your hands up on high
we want to celebrate your life
Of what you've done in His name
Spreading the word of His fame
Oh let your joy shine through
of how the Spirits within you

Verse II:
Now another day in your presence
a testiment of His love
It's so easy for me to see
Jesus Christ within you
I thank the Lord every moment
for his gift to us
Dear live, all your waking days
sharing mercy and kindness
To think another year has passed
and reflect on all we've seen
Every single, little blessing
Every single, little dream

Verse III:
As I write this very song
gaze along, down your path
seeing all your adventures
Oh, I can't help but laugh
You smile as you prance along
the path prepared just for you
Bringing with you all your friends
so they'll enjoy it too
I could write so much more
but I risk going too long
So keep your heart open wide
and may your love remain strong

Sorting through the mundane.

This afternoon I put some things in the wash, hung up clothes in the closet, ran the dishwasher, etc. Exciting right? Yet, so many moments of our days are filled with these simple and routine tasks and they are always less than exciting. I suspect its either the repetative nature of them or the fact that there is no surprise or alternate ending to them. The clothes always end up where they are supposed to be, the dishes always end up clean. However, these things are necessary so we persist in doing them.

Sometimes I feel this way about writing. Maybe that is why I am so inconsistent in responses to emails or writing on this very blog. It is hard to make such simple tasks exciting to a myself, let alone a reader. Yet sometimes when you stop and take the time to look and think about these little tasks, there is some interest that might be had.

I was sorting through my closet, and realized I had some pretty old sets of clothes in there. The first thing that struck me is that I should probably discard of some of them and give them to the Salvation Army. However the second thing that struck me is that some of them are from when I was back in High School. I still have a number of my button down dress shirts from them, and that is just crazy. I never wear the stuff anymore, but to think I have moved countless times taking those things with me, and its always like that when I move. I find some small piece of my past that I held on to. Often has little value than to contain the essence of a memory long forgotten. Still some of these tokens I still pack up gently as if they are prized possessions even if the person or place they represent are long gone figures of my past.

These simple and yet often unimportant trinkets hold the key to a thought, a feeling, a memory of someone or something I once cared for or still do. Anyway it was a nice moment of reflection, that I hope to run into again along my regular daily path. And who knows, I might just add a few things along the way.

I hope all my friends and family out there are safe and blessed. I care deeply for you all.

For the past few years, I've been preparing to purchase a new home. I've often questioned if purchasing a home as a single guy would be the wisest move. However, I just have a hard time visualizing myself paying rent my whole life. As the need arose to locate a new place to live, I figured now was as good a time as any. The last two months have been spent locating a place to live, and it looks like I've found it.

Now comes all the paperwork. :( It is amazing how many different documents they ask you to sign. I guess its not overly surprising due to the extent and size of the purchase, but it is still rather extraneous in my opinion. It's almost like they come up with new forms just so they can have a job.

I have admit my nervousness more so than my excitement. Is that a character flaw that I worry more about the obligation that enjoy the purchase? Who knows. All I know is that the idea of owing a mortgage is a bit disconcerting. However, I figure so many other people in the world can manage it, I figure I can get it worked out in the long run.

Anyway, by the end of February I should be the owner of a wonderful domicile. Now I just get to work on furnishing it. I joked with my boss that they could come visit, but they wouldn't know anyone is living there. :P But furniture and stuff is another thing that comes with time. I'm sure by the next time I have to consider moving I'll wonder where all the stuff came from, but until that time...